I Can't Even Re-Read This To See If It Makes Any Sense

I'm on this new asthma medication that is apparently the Superman of all inhalers. My doctor affectionately called it "The New Kid on the Block", which immediately made me think of the concert my friends recently went to as well as the cartoon "Hey, Arnold!" I have absolutely no idea why that cartoon popped into my head. I don't think I've watched it in years.

But I'm on this new medication, on top of a couple of other ones, and I can really tell that this is some strong stuff. Two or three times a day I am supposed to use the peak flow meter and then graph my L/minute. I've been hovering below the 400 mark for a while, even though I should be closer to 500. Twenty-four hours after starting with this new inhaler, I am up to about 450. Holy Moly, right?

Unfortunately, there seems to be some sort of side effect. Oftentimes I joke about having adult onset ADD, but much like the summer I was on Advair and prednisone and a million other things, I feel totally wired. I'm all jittery and have a hard time focusing. Today at lunch with a friend, I got a little over excited about what we were talking about, and my hand started to shake a little. Whoa.

I baked two different kinds of cupcakes today (half batches). Neither of the cupcakes turned out great, although they are edible, so it is alright. Maybe it would be better if they were gross, though, because then I would just get rid of them instead of trying to feed sub-par but edible cupcakes to my friends tomorrow.

It was all I could do, however, to stop making food. My friends don't really want a pot roast and cheesy potatoes with glazed carrots tomorrow. We'll probably just order pizza. I was really tempted though.

While I was making the two different kinds of cupcakes, I was also planting flowers and doing the dishes. Every actual productive project around the house (such as laundry or cleaning the bathroom), it was like I forgot why I was doing it in five seconds and wandered off.

Having conversations has been interesting today, too. I can tell that I am talking faster than normal and not stopping for punctuation, but I can't really help it. I feel my eyes darting around as people talk to me, but again, I can't seem to focus. Linnea was just on the phone with me, and she laughed at me because I just could not stick to a topic.

It is kind of funny, although this could really be bad at work on Monday. I need to speak slowly and not get distracted to easily. I need to be able to switch in and out of subject matter easily, and I NEED TO FOCUS! The kids are going to think I'm insane. I mean, they already think I'm crazy, but now they're going to think I need to be institutionalized.

Sure, it is nice being able to take a nice deep breath, but will this jittery, distractable behavior eventually subside? I certainly hope so because......

What's that?


Is that a dead bug? A dead bug in the windowsill?

I've got to see this up close. Maybe I should get a kleenex? I wonder if the cat killed it or if it died of old age? How long do bugs like that live, anyway? That is a big bug! How did it get in? I sealed up all the spaced around the air conditioner. Where's the cat? There she is. What's she sniffing like that for. I should make a roast. People like roasts. And apple pies. That's what the boys in the war like. WWII, anyway. I saw Captain America......

It's SO Hot That.....

The following statements are modeled after "Yo' Mama!" jokes, except they aren't jokes, they are true, and I can say the following sentences as a little white lady without being beaten up or given weird looks.

It is SO hot that.....

• I have an ice pack shoved down my shirt.
• even sitting in front of the window air conditioner, my clothes are wet with sweat.
• I want cupcakes but refuse to turn on the oven.
• I've gone to the fridge several times just to browse.....but really to feel the cool air.
• the condensation on the linolium at work actually splashed onto my legs as I walked across the floor.
• my glasses fogged up as soon as I left my air conditioned car.The heat literally blinded me.
• I left my lunch dishes in my car while I volunteered this evening, and the remaining eggplant Parmesan baked and crusted onto the sides of the pan and the lid popped off. Now my car smells like burnt eggplant parm.
• I am actually wondering, sanitary issues aside, how long it would take to cook cupcakes in my car in the garage.
• school is canceled tomorrow due to extreme heat and unsafe conditions in our building.

Experimental Cupcakes

Lisa recommended the Chocolate-Covered-Katie website to me claiming that she had made some questionable sounding desert and it tasted wonderful. To satisfy my curiosity, I visited the site. I ended up finding this recipe. This recipe appeals to me for numerous reasons:

1. I like cupcakes.
2. I enjoy spending my free time reading recipes I find online.
3. I am a single lady.
4. While generally I turn up my nose at anything vegan (because I have had some less than pleasant encounters with vegans trying to make me become vegan), vegan recipes are starting to become more appealing. I don't keep eggs in the house generally because I don't eat eggs by themselves. If I buy a half dozen eggs, use three to bake a cake, then I still have three left over. And I eat cake twice a day for a week.*

So I tried the recipe, substituting caramel flavored coffee creamer for the 1T plus 1 tsp non-dairy milk or water. Therefore, my cupcakes were not vegan.The cupcake turned out pretty good, and I ended up eating it hot right out of the oven.

Tonight I was invited over to a friend's house for dinner. She was making pasta salad and fancy-schmancy chicken brats from Trader Joe's, and I decided to bring dessert. I went back to this recipe and doubled it to make two cupcakes. This time instead of using coffee creamer for the extra liquid, I used straight up coffee. Then, so I wouldn't have white frosting on white cupcakes, I decided to make the cupcakes blue. Of course they turned out more green, but that's ok.

Cupcakes right out of the oven

They look kind of lonely all alone in the middle of that big pan.

 Because I don't have toothpicks, I had to stab one with my sharpest 

knife to determine whether or not it was done. See the stab mark? 

The frosting I improvised from powdered sugar, butter, vanilla, and a little bit of the flavored coffee creamer again. This means my cupcakes were still not vegan, so I could not feed them to any vegan friends. That was fine, however, because neither Ashley nor I are vegan.

Orange is my favorite color, so I decided to make the frosting orange. It turned out a bit runnier than I would have liked, so I probably should have used less butter and more powdered sugar, but that is alright. I could have fixed it, but then there would have been left over frosting.

 Orange Frosting

 Orange frosting and the dye used to accomplish the 

desired level of orangeness 

Here is what the final product looked like:

 Frosted cupcakes

 In orange pan for transport 

They turned out tasting alright, if not a little over-cooked. Also, you couldn't taste the coffee at all. Maybe next time I will add a little more coffee. This will not only hopefully enhance the flavor a bit, but maybe make the cupcakes a little more moist. Also, I will probably not try to dye the cupcakes blue. The final shade of green on the inside of the baked cupcakes was reminiscent of moldy bread, which was not exactly what I was going for.

Still, not bad. Next time I'll have to concoct some sort of decor for the top or just add sprinkles.

*This is not a bad thing, really. I maintain that cake makes a wonderful breakfast, though not as good as ice cream.

***Last chance to take this Disney Princess quiz and be part of the survey! Choose your answer! One of you has already indicated you aren't taking the stupid quiz! At least you participated!***