Hot! Hot! Hot!

I am a northern girl who loves the seasons and prefers cold weather to hot. Unfortunately, right now at 5:30 in the evening, according to my local weather people, it is 92.5 degrees Fahrenheit but feels like 112. What is that? This is not ok! And so I am sitting in my underwear as close to the window air conditioner as possible, sweating profusely. In fact, when I get up to move, I will probably leave a puddle of sweat. Yuck. That's kind of gross.

This video with music by Buster Poindexter makes being hot seem like more fun than it really is. Below are ways to cool down on hot, gross, Minnesota days like this. Most of them should be done in your home, and you probably don't want other people around. Just sayin'. For you normal folks out there, I'll throw in some "normal" ways to stay cool.

1. Don't go outside.
2. Sit as close to the window air conditioner or fan as possible.

3. Leave the house and go somewhere like Starbucks or the mall where the air conditioners keep everything a frigid, slightly uncomfortable 55 degrees Fahrenheit. Buy yourself a milkshake or iced coffee or something along those lines.

4. Fill the slip covers or your couch with bags of frozen vegetables (peas and corn work best). Sit on the couch in your underwear, possibly with another bag of frozen vegetables on your forehead.

5. Fill a bathtub with cold water. Empty all your ice trays into the tub. Get in.

6. Drink lots of water.

7. Buy and freeze fruit such as pineapple, strawberries, blueberries, and raspberries. Once frozen, place these fruits in a metal bowl and hold in your lap. Stick whole pieces of frozen fruit in your mouth and try to eat them. This is most enjoyable if you are sitting on your couch filled with frozen vegetables that you have placed as close as possible to the window air conditioner.

You are of course encouraged to mix and match any of the above for maximum coolness and/or enjoyable-ness. Any other ideas?